Dating in Your 30s

Written by dating expert Jennifer Carter.
Last updated: February 19, 2021

Dating in your 30s is a whole new ballgame compared to dating in your 20s. It almost seems like there is an entirely new set of rules for navigating modern dating to create a positive dating experience, either online or offline.

The landscape of finding love and dating habits has changed dramatically. The dating pool is now smaller when you start dating again in your 30s. Actively searching singles tend to become more specific in what they want in a match. If you find yourself single and dating again, or if you’re also trying to escape casual dating and online encounters you feel won’t serve you, perhaps some dating advice will come in handy to point you in the right direction.

Dating in Your 30s as a Man

The great thing about dating in your 30s as a man compared to dating in your 20s, is that you will meet like-minded people who know what they want. They’ve often taken stock on their previous dating experiences and will most likely be clearer on who they are and what they want from a relationship. Dating again at this age might seem a little more difficult as you may not have as many single friends.

If you think about dating in your 20s, you’re often still figuring out what your values are, what you like, and what you’re looking for in terms of qualities in a romantic partner. Online dating was much different back then, and the way you met other singles was most likely in the same social, geographic, and economic circumstances as you. Meeting other singles back then probably started as casual dating, then with good timing, it naturally turned into something far more significant.

When it comes to the online dating scene today and figuring out how to date in your 30s, you will find that most singles are using online dating apps and platforms to meet other like-minded potential partners. Meeting other singles when dating at 30 in this online space might seem daunting, but you can easily navigate it with these few steps and some dating tips for men to set you up for modern dating success.

man in suit holding hand of girl

Be Clear About What You Want

Being clear about who you want to meet might feel like pressure to remove any grey areas, but your search for love doesn’t have to be set in stone. The great thing about reflecting on a previous relationship and any dating experiences is that you can figure out what you want, and equally as important, what you don’t want in a relationship. Start getting clear with your intentions and your dating wants, so that you can communicate clearly with new people. It’s vital also to remember that good communication is key.

Be Clear About Your Intentions

Be honest with yourself about what you’re looking for when modern dating at over 30 years old. You don’t want to feel like it’s not working, and you’ll want to avoid wasting your time. It’s equally as important to be honest with dates and potential romantic partners about what you want. Suppose you’re looking for casual dating and not a serious relationship. In that case, it helps all parties if you’re upfront and clear about your intentions to save time, feelings being hurt, and investment from others who might not want the same thing as you.

Ditch the Rule Book

When you’re searching to meet that certain someone, it can be easy to get wrapped up in the masses of dating advice and tips for dating in your 30s as a man. Quite frankly, there is no cut and dry rule book with tips for dating. If you’re looking for specific rules to follow, you will most likely find some dating advice that doesn’t allow for the human element to take course. While there is most certainly some great dating advice out there, it’s equally important to pay attention to what you think, how you feel, and listen to your intuition about your dating life in certain romantic situations.

Dating in Your 30s as a Woman

When you’re single and want to start dating again, you may find that the dating pool in your 30s is completely different. You may also find that you are completely different from the person you were a decade ago, and what you want today – romantically speaking – is also different. Dating in your 30s is completely different. It’s no doubt you’ll be looking to say goodbye to any dead-end dates. You won’t want to settle for a partner who isn’t a good fit, and you’ll be looking at finding a meaningful connection.

Below is some great dating advice for women who are dating after 30. Here is some advice to consider to help you navigate modern dating and the pool of singles:

Be Open

When dating in your 30s as a woman. The older we get, the more specific we can become with our wants and goals. When dating after they have loved once or had a long time dating romantic potentials who haven’t worked out the way they had wanted, so many people start to create a long checklist. Check-in on your ‘checklist’ and see if everything on there is non-negotiable, or if you are willing to compromise for the right person and be open minded when meeting people.

Consider family values If you re-enter the pool of singles and start dating in your late 30s. You might start to consider dating someone with kids, or you may have some yourself. By opening your mind and your options, the pool of romantic opportunities will broaden for you. The more refined the search becomes, the more specific it can be to find ‘the one’. Depending on how you look at it, it can be a double-edged sword on that all-important romantic search when considering how to date in your 30s – especially when you’re looking to meet someone new in your love life and have them around for the long term.

Beautiful adult couple drinking coffee

Remember to Have Fun Along the Way

Even if you are serious about settling down when dating as a single woman in your 30s and are starting to approach dating seriously, try not to take the process or yourself too seriously. While you should approach the process openly and honestly, if you find that it becomes unenjoyable or you aren’t meeting the right kinds of single men for you, you may be putting too much pressure on yourself. When we enter committed relationships, we’re doing so with our best friends. Why not consider enjoying time with someone who is first and foremost your friend, that then may grow into something far more significant of the romantic nature? Try this approach and follow these crucial tips so that you don’t waste time looking to meet your match.

Be Patient

Have faith in the process when meeting new single people. Take note of our expert tips when navigating modern dating. You probably feel sure about who you are and what you need, so be careful not to be impatient, especially if you have a bad date that crosses your deal breakers. Remember, it’s not like the clock is ticking. Love doesn’t have an expiration date. Keep stepping out of your comfort zone and connecting with new people. If you do happen to have a bad date, know that it’s no big deal, it’s part of the life experience. They call it ‘dating’ for a reason. When it comes to finding a partner, you need to figure out what you don’t want in order to attract the right person successfully. Hopefully you’ll have a good time along the way, meeting lovely singles and finding love. Make it fun – the more laughter and happiness we have in our life, the greater we feel about ourselves. Endorphins are released, which is good for our mental health in the long run.

In conclusion, meeting people and dating in your 30s might not be as easy as it was in your 20s, but now you are likely far more comfortable in your skin than you once were when you were single in your 30s. You know yourself much better at this stage, especially if you’re in your late 30s. You’re far clearer on what you want for your love life and clearer on what you don’t want. The advice above is helpful to set you up for dating and love life success. As long as you’re patient and positive in the dating process, you are most likely to meet someone significant and successfully build a relationship together.